Charles Whitman, Julio Gonzales, Mama Cass. These are just a few names of those who have killed innocent people and/or buffet lines. The Douginator gives you five more to worry about in the future.

Max Power reviews a set of hit-or-miss movies, featuring Will Ferrell's most recent flop Semi-Pro, 2007's insta-classic Atonement, and Interview, Steve Buscemi's directorial debut.

Maybe you were thinking, "Man, I want someone in the Oval Office who would take Ecstasy." Your prayers are about to be answered! The Douginator interviews The Light Party's Da Vid.

Screw vegetables. A real man's diet is anchored with red meat, not green, stringy, leafy stuff. The Gerk takes a look at ten veggies that aren't ever going to cross his lips.

Every American man loves three things: outdoor hockey games, $.50 wing nights, and ice cold beer. Here at Arabian Monkey we would love to cover all three, but for right now we'll just stick to the brewed stuff. This time around, The Gerk and Demonic Laughter review some imported beer, namely Weihenstephaner Kristall Weissbier, Dragon's Milk, and Labatt Blue.

There Will Be Blood may not have won "Best Picture" at the Oscars, but rest assured that Arabian Monkey's movie reviewer Max Power believes it is definitely worth the price of admission. For this batch of movie reviews, Max also critiques Becoming Jane and takes a look back at a classic comedy, Fargo.

Max Power is back in action with another round of celebrity trash talking. This time he features the shitty music of Avril Lavigne, Matthew McConaughey's terrible new clothing line, and Whoopi Goldberg's snub from the 2008 Oscars.

Our buddy Jonathon has been up busy lately. The Arabian Monkey Press Association has the report.

Oh no! You woke up an hour late! You need to eat breakfast and get the smell of cheap booze and beef jerky off of your breath- but you only have time for one or the other! Toothpaste Flavored Poptarts just may be the perfect solution.

Sick and tired of your friends playing crappy Lenny Kravitz music on your computer? So are we. The Douginator has created The Lenny Kravitz Blocker for Mozilla Firefox users.

Do any of you remember a writer who went by the pseudonym Jesus Shuttlesworth? Check the "About Us" section if you've forgotten, or click the above link for his latest political tirade. The victim this time? The United States' relationship with Fidel Castro and Cuba.

Are you bat-shit crazy? Maybe you're a Scientologist! The Douginator helps you discover your inner Xenu and guides you to a State of Clear.

Some guys would prop a tent in any man's pants, and those on this list assuredly meet that criteria. Demonic Laughter explores his alternative lifestyle in this article intended to spark a debate over the validity of man-crushes.

It is a little known fact that when Aesop wrote his legendary fables thousands of years ago, he initially crafted them to be short stories of the trashy romance genre. In this edition of Aesop's Erotic Fables, The Gerk is proud to present one of the original texts of "The Tortoise and The Hare."

As Arabian Monkey's movie connoisseur, Max Power knows the best films for every occasion. A hot, steamy date is no exception- behold, the top ten date movies of all-time.