Have you ever known anyone who just couldn’t sit down? S/he would be folding the laundry, mowing the lawn, straightening up an already clean house, weeding, gardening, exercising, taking a bike ride, running to the store, washing the car, waxing...

It seems that as we get older, we get more and more stuck in our ways. For example, if I get really upset at my husband I tend to get quiet and stew. I do this every time I’m really...

Samantha asked her mother to please pick her up at school on time today since she has practice across town right after school. Her mother immediately became defensive and started explaining all the reasons she’s late. She told her daughter...

It never ceases to amaze me how poorly people speak of their partners when not in their presence. I hear women bad mouthing men in general, and their partners in specific, often. I hear men making derogatory statements about their...

Addiction is toxic to families. Regardless of which family member is the addict, all family members suffer. Once a family member is under the grip of addiction, the entire family’s life gets turned upside down. Regardless of what the addiction...

"The simple truth is that happy people generally don’t get sick." (Bernie Siegel, M.D.) “…and happy couples generally don’t get divorced” (Lisa Merlo-Booth, M.A.) Life is so stressful, busy, and pressured sometimes that we just forget to laugh. We get...

Women often fight immoderately--either overshooting or undershooting. When they overshoot, they yell, control, go on and on incessantly, or make repeated empty threats, all of which are ineffective. When women undershoot, they accommodate, say yes when they mean no, take...

A NOTE TO WOMEN In my previous post I wrote about men feeling as though they can never do anything good enough for their partners. My suggestion was for them to make sure that when they say they’re going to...

A NOTE TO MEN… One of the most common complaints I hear from men is they can’t do anything right. They swear that no matter what they do--even if they do exactly what their partner asked them to do--it’s not...

Anger is a common problem for many people in relationships, and it is toxic when not controlled. Individuals are struggling with it, children are emulating it, and couples are separating because of it. If you’re interested in a mutually energizing...

A very wise client sent me the following clip a while ago (thank you): Boston Globe columnist Linda Weltner tells a story about being at a playground, watching children at play. Two children got into an argument over a toy,...

Over the years I’ve heard many excuses for partners treating each other in emotionally abusive ways. When I say emotionally abusive, what I mean is: calling your partner names, swearing at him/her, yelling or screaming at your partner, belittling him/her,...

• Stacey’s son throws a temper tantrum every time he doesn’t get his way. Stacey responds by trying her best to placate her son and settle him down. She teaches her son that his tantrums work. • Steve’s wife often...

It may be surprising to know that many people decide to stay in their marriages while their partner’s openly having an affair. There are many reasons for this including: Fear of being alone Believing that if they stay and do...

Many women I work with struggle with wanting a different relationship yet not wanting to stand up to their partners to get one. They just wish that their partners would step up and be more relational on their own. I...